Dear "Z",
I hope you are doing well. I have no way of knowing that because I chose to distance myself from you. It wasn't because of anything you did. Not entirely anyways. I just needed that distance to keep my walls from coming down. You see, a while back, someone hurt me so badly that I broke and it took everything I had to pick myself up again. I am still trying to find pieces of myself and I think you can be one of those people who can break me all over again. And so, to protect myself, I must keep away from you.
I hope you realize how amazing you are. I think you tell yourself that you do realize that, but I don't think you truly do. Don't get me wrong. You can be such a pain in the ass and so much drama. But you can also be the reason for the smile on someones face when they wake up in the morning and the last pleasant thought before they close their eyes. I know you were mine for a while.
What changed then? So little. Yet so much.
My problem is that if I want someone in my life, I will make it happened. I feel too much. And you think too much. And that doesn't always go hand in hand. So while you can convince your head that we can be in each others lives the way we are, how do I convince my heart that what we share right now is enough?
I have to go now. I can see you online and I want to ping you and let you know about my day. But for a change, my head won over my heart. And that will help my heart heal again before someone breaks it all over again.
-Me.
I hope you are doing well. I have no way of knowing that because I chose to distance myself from you. It wasn't because of anything you did. Not entirely anyways. I just needed that distance to keep my walls from coming down. You see, a while back, someone hurt me so badly that I broke and it took everything I had to pick myself up again. I am still trying to find pieces of myself and I think you can be one of those people who can break me all over again. And so, to protect myself, I must keep away from you.
I hope you realize how amazing you are. I think you tell yourself that you do realize that, but I don't think you truly do. Don't get me wrong. You can be such a pain in the ass and so much drama. But you can also be the reason for the smile on someones face when they wake up in the morning and the last pleasant thought before they close their eyes. I know you were mine for a while.
What changed then? So little. Yet so much.
My problem is that if I want someone in my life, I will make it happened. I feel too much. And you think too much. And that doesn't always go hand in hand. So while you can convince your head that we can be in each others lives the way we are, how do I convince my heart that what we share right now is enough?
I have to go now. I can see you online and I want to ping you and let you know about my day. But for a change, my head won over my heart. And that will help my heart heal again before someone breaks it all over again.
-Me.
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